Wednesday, January 24, 2018

Begin Again...

It's been a full six months since I've blogged, which is an eternity online.  And honestly, the only excuse I have is I just didn't know what to say.  Every blog is an "expert" or a "mentor" or some other exceptional I right?  I'll be the first to admit I'm nowhere close to any of those titles (nor do I really want to be).

So, what happened in 2017?  For one, it was wonderful and secondly, it was horrible.  I know, dramatic, right?  So here I found myself, life plan forging ahead.  My own business burgeoning on 10 years, 2 year old twins, a selectively supportive spouse.  Living the dream!  In some ways, but the reality is two 2 year olds in the terrible two's, coupled with coming prematurely giving them both a significant speech delay, i.e. frustrated babies + can't cope mom = disaster.  On top of that, my first baby, our retail store nearly 10, we were finally hitting our stride, I at least thought.  I finally assembled a staff (all of which are now gone) and tho, I'm in a very small town, some new competitors moved in and played dirty.  Professionally and personally, I got a huge reality check.
But, some amazing things happened, I went to Belgium in October.  I only found out 6 weeks before we left that I could travel with my spouse on her work trip.  I had not been to Europe in 20+ years; I cried when the airplane took off because I just didn't think I would ever feel what take-off felt like again.

I became a full fledged butterfly enthusiast.  I raised and released a number of butterflies ranging from Black Swallowtails, Giant Swallowtails, Gulf Fritilaries, Red Admirals, and of course, Monarchs.  My Monarch Waystation, created in 2016, finally got some local notice and next month I will give my first official lecture to a Brownie Troop for their "bug badge" - I am thrilled!

And despite their frustrations, my kids did blossom.  They've been in a State provided intervention program Early Steps receiving OT and Speech.  Our therapists were miracle workers and often a sounding board for me as well.  They just aged out and I'm so proud of how determined, even at two, they were to learn and overcome a rough start.

I ended 2017 and began 2018 with most likely the flu.  It was the sickest I've been in a long time but on the bright-side, a good time for reflection.  What I deduced was:
  • I will stop pressuring myself to run the best store in town, in the state, in the world.  I will just strive to run a good store.
  • Planning and being prepared is better than multi-tasking
  • Stop expecting people to help; be grateful when they do.
  • Trust my instincts - when my stomach says "no" my head asks "why"
And lastly, I do want to take up this sweet blog again...even if most days its just me and my thoughts.  During my convalescence, I also decided to take up some of my old hobbies; I've been crocheting beautiful things, and making jewelry.  Also, I will probably get back into soap making as I feel it calling back to me.  Planning, as I stated above, will be key in getting all these things accomplished.  I hope you'll continue to follow along this journey with me!

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